When I was little, I didn't have big dreams about a beautiful ball gown or a massive cake or a perfect church to get married in. I didn't even think about that so called "perfect man."
Even now, I don't really care about marriage. When I started watching Sex and the City, I admired Carrie, Samantha, and Miranda for dating men and being secure in their relationships, but never wanting to be married. I never could understand why Charlotte always blew up every relationship into something that could end up in marriage.
Especially after seeing Carrie's relationships, it made me think that marriage wasn't exactly needed to have a happy relationship that was full of love. In fact, when her relationship ended up heading toward marriage, that is her second time around with Aidan, it completely failed.
Sometimes I think that Carrie knew deep down that Aidan was not the man she was meant to marry, when she knew it was Mr. Big all along, even if she did not think about marriage with him until much later in their relationship. Other times, I think that she just truly did not want to get married.
Since Carrie is my style and my life icon, I have begun to feel the same way she did about marriage. I always thought of why the show never really put an emphasis on marriage, rather just loving, successful, and long-term relationships.
Even though Carrie and Mr. Big's relationship wasn't exactly perfect throughout the show, neither of them were crazy about running to the altar. Let's face it- it wasn't Carrie's style and Mr. Big had already had two failed marriages. In the Sex and the City movie, Mr. Big and Carrie decided they wanted to get married and Mr. Big totally screwed her over. Not that Carrie is innocent; even she knew that the wedding had gotten to her head. The wedding, not the marriage.
In the end, Carrie was married to Mr. Big in a label-less dress with her Manolos in city court. This is the type of wedding I look up to.
My parents also had a similar situation. Of course, my dad definitely did not stand my mom up at the altar, but they were planning a huge wedding. The stress was so intense that they both ran off with their friends and were married in a gazebo in St. Petersburg, Florida.
Even though I am still not sure if marriage is really right for me, that's the type of wedding I want. One that should be like my marriage: one that is stress free, full of love, and just as fabulous as the Louboutins on my feet.
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